Finally

I have so much hatred inside of me for people it's starting to consume me completely and you know what...I like it, feels good. Fuck status quo of being forced into the circle I been in because of "family" and even "friends". Family is supposed to be forever, support, love and togetherness, not mine, example is the obvious. They have been a major part of my downfall and stress for the past few years and I let it, I really can't blame them, I blame myself for accepting the bullshit.

This is not some random thought of the week or the hour or minute for attention, sympathy or empathy, these are feelings that I buried for a long time and finally have the words to express cause as I said before I am better at words on paper or typing then speaking, I feel free.

Once I receive my inheritance (finally) I'm out. No surprises. I am cutting ties with everyone who contributed to my pain, my hurt and anger. My mom died partly because of drama, and a broken heart and hurt, my belief. but she died also to my belief with no regret and she shouldn't of had any cause what she did for her children was more then she should have. I kept my mouth shut to long due to my own ignorant belief of "family" and "friends". MISTAKE.

All and all I will stay in contact with my father cause I do love the fucker though he and I are not really on good terms this due to things being said about me (like always) or written to him about me and him idiotically believing it and I have yet to talk to him, soon enough.

Oh and people who want to assume this or whatever is about them, look at the first three letters of that word and its exactly what you are for doing it. People are not important enough for me to waste me breathe. I have found my peace, I have found my calm, I have found my center and its my hate and I only post this because this is the perfect platform for me not vent but finally let out what's been eating me and more to the truth of the reason....but that's another time.